dear diary ‧₊˚✩彡

i luv dreaming ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆


december 19, 2022

i've been feeling a bit better so i thought i'd share my christmas list of gifts i hope to recieve this christmas :3 i loveeeee christmas sooooo much its my favorite holiday of the year!! my family requests a list each year so we know what to buy each other so heres mine

these are all things i just had on my ebay watch list lol the first one is a pinky monkey plush/small storage item, i plan to put my jewelry in there if i get it the second is something i've wanted for a while :3 & the third and forth are plushies i've been wanting to add to my collection but just decided to wait until christmas to ask for them lol I hope you all get the gifts on your wishlist this year!!

december 9, 2022

sorry i haven't written, i had to put down my cat on Nov. 3 and i've not been able to handle my grief, i've never experienced any feeling like this in my entire life, i realize now nothing is permanent, i've been a fool in thinking that the love i've recieved from my friends and family gives me a permanent place on this earth, but it doesn't. There's not a day that goes by where i don't think of my cat, my friend :( he was just here.... i keep telling myself, and with the tightest grip i try to hold onto the last day he was here, my nails sinking deeply into the last memories i have of petting him and watching him lay in the sun, all the while punishing myself for being such an idiot..for not cherishing him more, for taking him for granted. i'll never take anything for granted again, i'll let everything linger for a little while longer, and then a little more after that...because time is so short... more than any of us realize..


reminiscing about old times & "barbarian" review

i put up a giant inflatable of a pumpkin into my drive way, it was about 8 feet and loomed so cutely over my yard. unfortunately i had a total of 8 trick or treaters stop by my home, can you believe it!! only 8?! I can literally recall all their costumes, the first was a cute butterfly , the second & third were wednesday adams and a racecar driver, then three kids, two witches and a cowboy,then lastly 2 teenage boys. i gave them the rest of the candy that was left (which was practically the whole bag!) and they gleefully ran off.. at least the parents that came with the kids took photos with the pumpkin but over all i was kinda sad by the turn out lol i remember when i was a kid there were hundreds of kids swarming the streets, i guess since i dont live in an apartment anymore there aren't many kids around .. and no one in my neighborhood decorated ....soz lol anyways after that i watched barbarian so please stop reading if you dont want to be spoiled!!!!!!!!! so yes our protanganist is a freaking idiot who arrives at her air bnb for the night and finds that it's been double booked. any sane human being would promptly find a hotel, motel, or sleep in their car but NO she decides to STAY. you just can't have that kind of confindence in your fellow man anymore these days but whatever, i can understand that for the sake of the plot needing to move forward she must stay in that house -_-. i like how they build the suspense by having you believe that her air bnb roomate could potentially be a crazy psycho killer the whole time up until the moment HE DIES and actually turns out he was a nice cool guy and this could've potentially been a romantic meet cute story for our protaganist, that whole thing i did enjoy. & they did a good job casting him because he does give weirdo vibes lol and the reveal of the monster (mother) did scare me!! then the movie switches to this actor guy who is accused of being raped and is then "cancelled" by hollywood or whatever... i didn't really care for him and i was glad he died in the end because it turns out he did actually rape his costar so he could go choke and he totally tried to sacrifice the protaganist to save himself after our protaganist WENT BACK FOR HIM !!! thats another thing ughhh i love/hated our protaganist soooooo much like why would you ever want to go back and save a person you JUST met, i understand going to the police and getting help is all well and fine but if i were her and i saw what i saw i would catch the first flight back home and try to bury the memory of what i endured lol. and i knew they were going to get that homless man killed too, like whyyyyyy why does the homeless man even live in that area knowing whats inside that house like that was insane to meeeee hahaha. onto my favorite character of the whole movie...mother, i actually started crying at the end can you believe it? lol a victim of incest, torture, and rape, all she wanted was a baby to care for.. and when she saved her life for the protaganist i was sad, and the tears came when the protagnist finally held the gun to her face but mother didn't know what was coming, all she wanted was to caress her "baby" i love these designs for these monsters we have been getting lately. i loved the reveal of the monster in smile too but was the movie even that good? idk thats a conversation for another time. all in all i give this movie a 6.9/10 for its originality, design for the monster and story.

Tokomon - Digimon